A Little Love for the Men Who Rarely Ask for It

By Kenneth Braswell, CEO, Fathers Incorporated

Let’s just be honest. On April 19, Husband Appreciation Day will come and go for most men without fanfare, balloons, or a well-cooked steak. It’s not a federal holiday, there’s no big box store display, and no one’s getting the day off.

But Husband Appreciation Day exists. And it matters.

As a man who’s walked down the aisle twice, I’ve lived enough husbandhood to know that appreciation often comes in quiet moments or not at all. I was 18 when I got married for the first time — young, in love, and full of bold ideas about what it meant to be a man and a partner.

That marriage didn’t last, and I wouldn’t remarry for another 25 years. That gap wasn’t because I feared commitment but because I needed to grow. I needed to learn who I was without a partner before I could be who they needed me to be.

Marriage is hard. It takes work, presence, and a lot of unglamorous effort. And husbands, though imperfect, often carry more than anyone realizes.

According to a recent survey, 69% of wives say what they appreciate most about their husbands is that they’re hard workers. That tracks. Most of us wear that quality like a badge of honor, even if it sometimes makes us ghosts in our own homes.

Husbands don’t always say the right things. We forget anniversaries (only 5%, though). We snore (46% of us do, apparently). And yes, we sometimes suffer from “selective hearing.” But we’re also the ones who make our wives laugh (61%), support their dreams (52%), and show up even when we don’t know what we’re doing because no one ever showed us how. Many of us didn’t grow up with marriage modeled around us. We’re building blueprints out of broken pieces and still trying to make the house stand.

So if you’re a husband, especially a husband in today’s world, April 19 is your day, even if you have to clap for yourself. Otherwise, we can go unseen until something breaks. Until we fall short. Until our flaws are louder than our efforts. But Husband Appreciation Day gives us a moment, however fleeting, to be recognized not just for what we do but for who we are.

To the women who love us: We don’t need grand gestures. But a moment? A hug? A whisper that says, “I see you, and I’m glad you’re here”? That can carry a man through another long week of providing, protecting, parenting, and just trying to be a better man than he was yesterday.

And to the husbands reading this: if nobody else says it, I will: You are appreciated. You matter. You are not invisible. The love you give, the weight you carry, the sacrifices you make — these don’t go unnoticed even if they go unmentioned.

Let’s normalize applauding men not just for what they achieve but for how they show up in love. Whether you’re the romantic type, the quiet doer, the strong silent partner, or the goofball who still thinks dad jokes are funny (because they are), today is yours. Not because the world says so but because we do.

Happy Husband Appreciation Day. You earned it.